Brace yourselves. Juan Uribe is coming and odds are he is going to find his way on base. So far this season, Juanito is rocking a .420 OBP. 420!!!!!!! Consider my mind blown. I love it. Lately he has been surprisingly not awful. His swing is still hilarious but he looks so much better when he isn’t swinging at every crap pitch thrown his way. Granted, large part of Juan being appealing has to do with how awful Cruz looks by comparison. Still, I am enjoying the absurdity of a super patient Juan Uribe that walks a bunch. I’m really not sure if this is for real or how long it will last but for now credit where credit is due. Add to this, reports that Juan is a good guy that really wants to help the team and I am all for rooting for his redemption.
Posted by paintthecorners on May 13, 2013
Ah Carl. The gift that keeps on giving. I cannot get enough of Carl Crawford on the base paths. I don’t know why but he is so amenable to photoshop and being put into strange images. So here we go. Enjoy!
Once again Carl made the mistake of taking a turn down the wrong street. Feet don’t fail me now!
Waking up late is such a bad habit. Carl barely makes it to the dramatic slow walk
That was the absolute last time Carl helps Sherlock on one of his crazy cases.
Carl’s tropical vacation takes a turn for the worst
Last one out is lunch.
Carl fulfills his life long dream of running with the bulls.
If you have any other suggestions of where you’d like to see Carl running, hit me up on twitter. @Eephusblue
Forrest and Carl refuse to back down to oncoming traffic
Posted by paintthecorners on May 13, 2013
So times are bleak and it doesn’t look like it is going to get better any time soon (Thanks Ned, Don). So, rather than focus on the depressing lack of moves by management, I want to focus on something positive. AJ Ellis. I absolutely love that guy. He is hands down my favorite Dodger right now and a bright spot on a Dodgers team that is lacking in bright spots (in addition to Clayton Kershaw of course!). Eno Sarris over at Fangraphs has an outstanding interview with AJ while he was in San Francisco that is definitely worth your time to read. Mike Petriello also has some nice things to say about our favorite Dodger catcher over at Mike Scioscia’s Tragic Illness.
As brought up at MSTI, from the Sarris article:
When the season’s over, he’ll head to Milwaukee for the winter. “My wife is from Milwaukee, so it’s happy wife, happy life,” he told me, which means he’ll train in the snow for another season. “I’m like Rocky in `Rocky IV,’” Ellis said, “going to fight the Russian, in the Siberian snow, chopping down trees, getting to the top of the mountain and yelling ‘Zitooo!’”
Oh sweet, sweet Rocky reference. That is just all kinds of awesome. Mike requested a photoshop job of AJ as Rocky and I got carried away and went full montage sequence. I imagine this is exactly how AJ trains in the offseason in the harsh Milwaukee frost.
Click image to enlarge for up close awesomeness.
Posted by paintthecorners on May 7, 2013
I just don’t know what to expect from this team anymore. The way management has managed (or failed to manage) this recent rash of injuries defies logic. Every possible explanation I can come up with just doesn’t make sense when you stop and think about it. Mellis is hurt? Keep him on the roster as long as possible. AGonz has a sore neck that bothers him when he runs? Play through the pain, don’t call up SVS. Jerry Hairston Jr has a strained groin? Wait until the absolute last minute to test if he is a go tonight and don’t have anyone on a plane or in reserve just in case so you can play yet another game short a man. Just who is making the decisions? So Stan Kasten is a really smart guy. In fact, the smartest guy that Greinke knows! So where is Stan in all this? This sure feels like Ned. I can’t help but think of the following image with how everything is being handled.
I feel like there is a giant iceberg right ahead, and no one cares or knows enough to react to it. I really hope this changes before it’s too late.
Posted by paintthecorners on May 6, 2013
Because we all need something positive today, check out Dee Gordon sliding past Posey’s tag from last night. Dee was plenty awesome and was a big reason why we almost won that game.
The amazing part is, Dee actually paused for half a beat before breaking for home and was still fast enough to beat the throw. Hot damn is he fun to watch!!
Posted by paintthecorners on May 5, 2013
I defend Donnie a lot. Mostly because replacing him probably won’t bring an upgrade. Most MLB managers will do the same dumb shit day in and day out because winning isn’t about numbers or strategy. Its about feeeeeeelings and gut instincts. Or ‘The Will To Win’ or some other stupid intangible. But come on! After tonight I find myself having a hard time finding reasons to defend Donnie. Just awful decisions being made.
Posted by paintthecorners on May 4, 2013
Luis Cruz is becoming infuriating to watch. Whenever he comes up in the lineup, we pretty much know how its going to end: feeble pop up, automatic out. Many may think I hate Cruz, and that’s just not true. I really do like him. He seems like a nice guy, happy to be given the opportunity he has. But daaaaamn his inability to hit is hurting the team. I want him to succeed because he is really really slick with the glove and we NEED some good defense on the left side when Hanley comes back.
Chad Moriyama has a great article discussing what could be wrong with poor Luis. Maybe he can be fixed? I hope he turns it around. Its getting to the point where I would rather have Juan Uribe start. That’s right. It makes me slightly ill to write those words. But Juan looks like a different player this season. Hope it lasts.
In honor of Luis’ new found penchant for popping up in the most feeble way possible, I was inspired to make the following animation. Its a bit random but it makes me laugh.
Posted by paintthecorners on April 29, 2013
Good Lord! This team. Yuck! Right now they have the worst luck. THE WORST! That double with Kemp and Crawford on that bounces up and out for a ground rule double with Kemp flying to third is the perfect example of this. Matty would have scored easily but instead we only get one run. Ugh. Yeah yeah. It’s baseball. But it is also depressing. So let’s laugh about it.
Sometimes, this team just looks:
Posted by paintthecorners on April 15, 2013
This post was a long time coming…..well some version of it. I’ve been thinking on this since Luis Cruz went all avenging warrior on us in the Mexico-Canadia game. It took the ugliness of the last week to make me put words on paper dealing with this subject. Brawls have no place in the MLB. There, I said it. I am tired of wincing when the benches clear and praying that our players don’t get hurt doing something stupid. I’m not going to lie. Some part of me deep down loves a good fight. The same part in high school that ran over to see two guys beat the crap out of each other while everyone chanted “FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!”. But that’s the thing isn’t it? That part of me that is compelled to stare at such a spectacle has the mentality of a teenager. When the blood lust calms down and you look at it objectively, it really is silly. In the aftermath, nothing good is ever achieved by this. Up until a few days ago, the Dodgers have always walked away from such a melee with a few scratches and a bruised ego or two.
Unfortunately, the Dodgers were not so lucky this time. Our 147 million dollar Dodger ace B is now the proud owner of a broken collar-bone, all because a Neanderthal ape of a man couldn’t control his rage at a slight that was all in his head. Again, nothing good was achieved by this. In fact, a whole lot of bad has developed. Not only did we lose Greinke for at least 2 months, but Jerry Hairston is now suspended for a game. Matt Kemp came very close to doing something very stupid in the parking lot, which would have led to a suspension, if not something worse. And best of all, we now have Dodger fans calling for blood, demanding that Kershaw or Billz drill the Padres in retaliation, as if that will make Zack’s bones heal faster. Don’t get me wrong, I was howlin’ mad when that ogre plowed into Greinke. I understand your anger, frustration, and the feeling of helplessness. But you think losing ANOTHER key pitcher to a suspension after we lost Greinke is going to help us? I thought the point of all this was to win the World Series.
So I humbly offer this for your consideration.
Instead of ‘getting back at them’ for what they did, how about we just beat them on the field? Instead of hitting their players how about we hit their pitches? How about if we win for Zack? I am sure Greinke would appreciate a stack of wins in his honor better than a stack of injured bodies. When he comes back in June (as I hope he will), wouldn’t he be happier if we are leading the division, setting the stage for his return and the boost he will bring? All this blood lust and talk of retaliation will lead to nothing positive. It will just perpetuate a cycle of ugliness that will just go on and on and perhaps result in loss of more players. Instead, just win for Zack! To my fellow Dodger fans, channel the anger you feel into your cheers for the team. That urge you feel to boo the Padres? Use it to let your team know you have their backs. Put an end to the negativity.
It’s fitting that the first meeting between these two teams happens on Jackie Robinson day with everyone wearing 42. Think about the hell that Jackie had to endure, all without any form of physical or verbal retaliation. What happened last week was awful, but it was in no way near what Jackie dealt with. As AJ Ellis said, what’s done is done. Let it go. Rise above it. I hope the Dodgers honor Jackie’s memory by rising above the blood lust and calls for vengeance and just beat them on the field.
Posted by paintthecorners on April 15, 2013
Posted by paintthecorners on April 10, 2013